I’m Janet, I’m 23 years old, and this is my testimony.
Revelation 12:11 – And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death (KJV).
What was my life like before I came to Christ?
I grew up in a loving, supportive home with both parents and an older sister. I was in church every Sunday growing up. I participated in so many church activities. Every time the church doors opened, I was there....Sunday school, Bible study, vacation Bible school, church programs. Growing up, I always identified myself as a Christian because I attended church and participated in all these activities, not even knowing that regular church attendance and church activities are just works, and works CANNOT save you.
When I was 12 years old, I was so afraid of going to hell so I walked down the aisle, shook the preacher’s hand, and joined the church. I thought I was saved and that I was okay, but in reality, I didn’t understand the Gospel and I didn’t understand that Jesus died for my sins so that I could have a relationship with God. I didn’t have anyone at that time teaching me the Word of God or discipling me. I was lost and didn’t even know it.
So let’s fast forward to high school. I would say that high school was probably the WORST 4 years of my life. I wasn’t the popular girl, the cheerleader, or on homecoming court. I didn’t have a lot of friends. I got teased a lot and picked on by kids at school. 9th grade was pretty bad. I got teased everyday for almost an entire semester by a group of guys because of the way I looked. So because of all of this, I had very low self-esteem, I thought I was ugly, and I hated myself. I didn’t get a lot of attention from guys in high school. I didn’t have guys lined up at my door wanting to take me to the movies on a Friday night. I wasn’t the girl that all of the guys wanted to take to the prom.
So I come to college Fall 2007, and I immediately noticed a difference. In high school it seemed like no guys were interested in me, and now I come to college and guys seem to actually be interested in me. I mean starting from week 1, I’m getting numbers from guys all the time, talking to this one, and that one, and that one over there....all at the same time. I was hanging out in guys’ dorms whenever. I mean I had freedom, and I was going crazy. I cursed like a sailor. I started trying to get into the whole party thing. I was drinking a little bit here and there because I thought it would make me look cool. Sex...I was getting me some. I mean why not? Everybody’s doing it. I thought that it was okay to have sex with my boyfriend, even though we weren’t married. I was living life TOTALLY apart from God, and I didn’t care. You know why? Because I was young and I wanted to live it up. I was lost and on my way to hell.
So in October 2008, which was my sophomore year of college, I called myself “getting right” again, so I walked down the aisle again, shook the preacher’s hand, repeated some prayer, and I thought I was saved, yet I still didn’t understand the Gospel. I bought a bible and started trying to read it. I read it cover to cover, just to say that I’d completed it. I didn’t read it for understanding and for intimacy with God. I just read it to say I’d read it. I started trying to change myself, but I couldn’t. Nothing changed in my life. I was still leading a sinful lifestyle, and there was NO fruit in my life that showed that I had truly repented from my sins.
Matthew 3:8 – Bring forth therefore fruit meet for repentance (KJV)
On the outside, I appeared to be this “good girl, ”and when I compared myself to others, I wasn’t half-bad, but when I compared myself to God’s standards, I was a total wreck! I put on this façade like I was the “good, Christian girl” and that I loved God, but my lifestyle showed that I hated God. I wasn’t being obedient to God’s commands, and in reality I loved my sin and I hated God.
John 14:21 – He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him (KJV).
For the entire 4 years of my college career, I defined myself by my relationship status. I just HAD to have some guy in my life. From Day 1 up until a few months before graduation, I ALWAYS had some guy in my life. The longest time period in which I didn’t have some guy in my life was probably 2 months. I just had to have somebody. Because I wasn’t used to receiving this kind of attention from guys in high school, I came to college and was desperate for this male attention. I was thirsty for male attention when I should have been thirsting for Christ. Thirsting for men left me dehydrated, but now that I thirst for Christ, I’m satisfied because He is the ONLY one that can quench my thirst. I looked for a man to complete me, when in reality, no human can EVER complete me. No human died on the cross for our sins to pay the price. Only Christ did that, so only He can complete us.
I graduated from college May 2011. It was during that summer after I graduated that God convicted my heart. I knew something was missing in my life, and I felt empty. I realized that God was the ONLY one who could fill those voids in my life. God convicted my heart, and I realized that I didn’t know Him and that I wasn’t living a life that was pleasing to Him. It was then when I became intentional about having a relationship with God and spending time with Him through prayer and reading the Word. God FINALLY got me alone. There weren’t any more guys coming in and out of my life taking up the spot that God deserves. I started noticing God working out so many things in my heart. The sinful desires that I once had, He took those away. He started molding me in the image of Christ, and I started to actually live this thing out, and I started seeing fruit in my life. On October 30, 2011, I was baptized and publicly identified myself with the body of Christ. Now that I look back and see just how much God has done in my heart from then until now, I can’t help but be grateful and thankful that the blood of Christ is powerful enough to cleanse me from all the sins and faults of my past. All the glory goes to Him! I now realize that I am NOTHING without Christ. My identity is found in Him and Him ALONE!
It’s now that I understand the Gospel. I now understand that God is perfect and holy, and that He hates sin and because He hates sin, now I must hate sin. Because of my sin and because I was born a sinner, I deserve death and eternal damnation, but because Christ died on the cross and paid the penalty for my sins, I now have eternal life and I’ll spend eternity in heaven with God. I couldn’t work for my salvation or earn it. Works alone didn’t have the power to save me.
Ephesians 2:8-9 – For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast (KJV).
The only assurance that I have of my salvation is my faith in Christ and my faith that the work He did on the cross is the ONLY sufficient payment for my sins. Christ is the only way to have a relationship with God.
John 14:6 – Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me (KJV).
The Gospel is the most important truth you’ll ever hear in your life. The world will have you thinking that life is about the drinking, drugs, partying, sex, living it up, YOLO, etc. But that’s not life...that’s bondage. Christ came to set you free from that bondage. Truly living is dying to yourself, taking up your cross daily, and following after Christ.
Luke 9:23- And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me (KJV).
True life begins when your life ends, and you become a new creature in Christ.
2 Corinthians 5:17 – Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new (KJV).
So now I can say that I am a new creature in Christ. I can proudly say that I am no longer in bondage to ungodly relationships, and I am remaining abstinent until marriage! I’m no longer relationship hopping, I’m super single and complete in Christ, madly in love with Christ, and WAITING on the man that God has for me. I’m a living testimony as to how God can truly change a life!